Have you ever found yourself face to face with your perfect woman? She's gorgeous, she gets you, she's fun to be with and there's enough chemistry between you to blow up a lab?

There's just one problem - she's straight.

Personally I would need more than one hand to count the number of times I have been in this predicament. Now the question is - do you respect Ms Perfect's sexuality and leave her alone or do you chase her using those oh so subtle yet oh so effective girlish charms we all possess? Because, let’s face it, there are not a lot of girls out there that will die not knowing. Am I right?

I may not be winning any popularity contest here but I always decided to chase and had I not, I would not be in my current relationship of two and a half years.

There's something so electric about that first kiss with Ms Perfect. The knowledge that yours are the first female lips that have locked with hers and the nerves that lie behind it, fuelled by their fear of the unknown. Every touch feels as if no one has ever touched them in that way before, almost like taking their virginity away all over again.

These straight girl experiences can be very thrilling and of course rocket your ego into orbit, for you must be something pretty special to avert their eyes from the Pepsi man in the advert to 'little old you'. But do we want to turn their heads forever? Are we trying to turn these straight girls or are we just having a bit of fun?

On a couple of occasions, once the thrill of something new has worn off, both myself and Ms Perfect have lost interest. She has toddled off back to the land of heterosexuality and I have bid her a fond farewell. You see in these cases I knew that there was no future for her in our wonderful world that we call Gay. Although I had a lovely time showing her around ;-)

On the other hand there are those ‘Ms Perfects’ that you just can't help falling head over heels for.

Take Emily for example. Emily was in a two year relationship with Ryan. It wasn't the happiest of relationships, in fact neither of them were 'happy' unless they were screaming and shouting at each other.  After working with Emily for a few months we developed a very close friendship and an overwhelming sexual attraction to each other. For another month or so we indulged in a bit of harmless flirting. You know ever lame trick in the book, I don't need to tell you the details. All was perfectly innocent until one night, not particularly different from the rest, she came back to my apartment as she often did after a few drinks.

A round of toast was required to soak up the alcohol. So as Emily and I were waiting in the kitchen we had one of those moments. You know the ones - when all of sudden you realise that you're kissing and you have no idea how you got there, let alone who instigated it. They were manic, pressured 'got to have you now' kind of kisses. We pawed at each other’s bodies as if the oxygen in the room would disappear if we didn't make bodily contact.

Our longing for each other over the last few months and the knowledge that this was so 'illegal' only intensifying the situation. We made love for eight solid hours and didn't tire once. Emily had no sexual inhibitions and where I had shown her an incite in to the passion between two women she had led me into her fantasies about this evening and her adaptation of straight sex in to our bed.

We continued in our, what can only be classed as an, affair for months. But whilst we were having such an amazing time she was not prepared to leave Ryan. Whether this be because Emily didn't think that she was gay or maybe because she didn't want to be gay or maybe because she didn't love me like she said she did. I didn't know. Looking back I realise that I never asked her leave him. Perhaps I knew what the answer might be and that would be too big a bash to the ego or maybe because I was afraid of spoiling what we had together.

This girl was amazing. We had the best time and, much like visiting a baby, you take a quick cuddle, gush at how lovely they are and when they start to cry, send them back to their parents, or in this case Ryan. All the fun, without the pressure. At the time that seemed enough for me and we carried on as we were for about eight months.

Now I'm sure that you're all probably sitting up on your high horses feeling terribly sorry Ryan sat at home waiting for his beautiful buxom blonde girlfriend ( had to get that in somewhere!! ) to come home. I don't blame you but the fact of the matter was that Ryan knew. Without saying to the pair of us ' look I know you're fucking' he gave every impression that he didn't mind. He even made a statement once that said that if Emily and I were to sleep together he wouldn't mind because he wouldn't class it as cheating. He had no explanation for it, that was his opinion and he was sticking to it. Ordinarily a comment like that would have rocketed me in to an outraged rant defending all fellow lesbians but in this instance Emily and I took our free meal ticket and ran!

Perhaps he was trying to save face because he suspected we were having an affair already but either way when you're doing something wrong it's easy to grasp at straws that might justify your actions and it also helped ebb my guilt ( yes, I'm not that cold hearted - I did feel a little guilty! )

And so Emily and I kept seeing each other with a drunken night here, a quick fumble at work and many a sordid and explicit txt or phone call in between.

But as my confidence grew in my sexuality - I had only been out to my parents a year at this point - I found that I grew tired of being kept a secret and that in fact being second best to Ryan just wasn't good enough for me.

I ended things with Emily and not long after met Kate. A beautiful, out and proud gay woman. I'd be lying if I said that Kate measured up to Emily but she was lovely and pretty but most importantly she was gay. Probably not the best grounds on which to base a new relationship but hey, it worked at the time.

Emily, needless to say, was not pleased and did not handle the situation gracefully. Now we were in a bizarre predicament. Nobody was supposed to know about Emily and I, though of course a few suspected, so Emily had no way of venting her anger and frustration. She couldn't rant or preach or even appear cross with me. She was completely powerless because, of course, she still had to play happy families with Ryan and when it came down to it she had no rights over me whatsoever. Surely she couldn't have expected me to hang around forever?

Well it turned out she did. She even accused me of being a hypocrite. She just couldn't understand why I couldn't continue with our affair. She had cheated on her boyfriend "for me" and therefore I should cheat on my girlfriend with her! It was as if one bad deed deserved another!

I told her I couldn't do that to Kate and actually I had no desire to. Kate wanted to be with me, all the time not just when it suited her. No more second best, only first place for me from now on.

After that last conversation Emily and I went our separate ways. She couldn't see past her selfish needs. Couldn't even fathom the concept of losing her lesbian lover for the sake of her lesbian lover's happiness. She enjoyed the benefits of our wonderful world that we call Gay but could not face moving in for good. Like going to visit a baby, she took the best bits then handed it back before it got too scary.

So was it all worth it?

If I had just let the pretty straight girl be, I would have saved myself a lot of agro and heart ache.

But hey better to have loved and lost than to not to have loved at all. Well that’s what I think anyway.